


Truth, all over again

by samariumwriting



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: Background My Unit | Reflet | Robin/Olivia, Coming Out, Family Fluff, Gen, Nonbinary Character, Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-27
Updated: 2020-09-27
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:01:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,164
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26682613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/samariumwriting/pseuds/samariumwriting
Summary: Whenever he can, Inigo goes out to the woods to practise dancing. Because if anyone sees, they won't just know he dances, but they also learn all kinds of things about him that he definitely doesn't want to discuss.One night, someone watches him, but he can't work out who it was.
Relationships: Azur | Inigo & Marc | Morgan, Azur | Inigo & My Unit | Reflet | Robin
Comments: 6
Kudos: 24





	Truth, all over again

**Author's Note:**

> This piece is for Trans Awakening Weekend, held over at @fetranshub on twitter!

The moon was high in the sky by the time Inigo reached the clearing. He'd waited until the clouds cleared, knowing that going out in the middle of the night when he couldn't see was nothing short of stupid. But now, with no one around and nothing else to worry about, he could finally get some practise done.

He closed his eyes for a moment, took a deep breath, and began to move. At this point, every gesture was engraved in his memory, right down to the last cell. Each flick of his wrist, each point to his toes - he knew it back to front, from the first step to the last. There was no music, just the gentle sound of bugs and the flow of the river somewhere off in the distance, but he knew the timing anyway. His mind remembered each note loud and clear.

It was good to finally get away. He couldn't practise often - it  _ had _ to be done in the dead of night. Partly so no one would see that he danced; he couldn't bear to imagine the way people might react. What they might want him to  _ do. _

But he knew, mostly, that the reason he didn't want anyone to see was because he didn't want an audience. He didn't want people to watch the way his body moved and read something particular into it. After all, his mother taught this dance to a little girl, and-

Inigo knew he shouldn't hide it. He didn't want to, really. He didn't like keeping secrets, after all, because the darkest things in the world were exactly what needed to be brought to light. Yet he couldn't help but keep it hidden, keep it concealed.

It wasn't that he was ashamed. He hadn't been, not for a long time, and he definitely wasn't now. But that didn't mean he wanted to have a conversation about it; the world around them was already so horribly complicated, and something like this would just make it worse. He had no desire to confuse anyone more than he already had just by being here.

The thoughts troubled him and, after a moment, he stumbled. His body stilled when his steps faltered and, just for a moment, he could have sworn he felt eyes on him.

If Inigo had thought himself still before, it was nothing compared to now. He stiffened every limb into something resembling a fighting stance, though his sword lay on the ground just a short distance from him. If someone burst out now, he might be able to reach it.

He narrowed his eyes into the darkness. He couldn't see anything, not really, but-

Movement. A figure, turning away. Nothing more than the movement of fabric, not something he could really  _ identify  _ and maybe nothing more than a trick of light or wind, but something that set his heart racing even more just the same.

"Hello?" he called. He darted over to his sword, backing up against a tree just in case. "I know you're there! Come out and show yourself!"

Nothing answered, bar the call of a fox. But that wasn't it, he  _ knew  _ it wasn't. The figure was too high off the ground for just an animal, and one of the Risen wouldn't turn away like that. There was someone there, someone who had seen him practise, and he had no idea who it was or how much they'd seen.

He didn’t know how much of what he kept hidden was now laid bare before them.

And that left him with nothing to do. He couldn't confront them, couldn't demand they keep silent. He couldn't bribe them, threaten them. He could only hope that, whoever they were, they decided to keep their mouth shut. This was the last thing he needed, and  _ definitely  _ the last thing someone like Chrom needed on his mind when they were in the middle of a damn war.

Unfortunately, it was also the last thing Inigo needed on  _ his  _ mind in the middle of a damn war. The next time he was on the battlefield, he felt like everyone's eyes were on him.

Perhaps it wasn't true - it wasn't like anyone had time to stare at him during battle, and it definitely couldn't be  _ everyone,  _ because someone would have spoken to him about it. But it was a strong enough feeling that it left him with the sensation that he was decidedly off balance.

It made him overly nervous and jumpy, and he  _ hated _ that. He always tried to abandon his fears on the battlefield; they only got in the way of everything that needed to be done. But this... this was a lot, and he couldn't stop it from ruining his focus.

Inigo tried to swallow down the frustration that built up in his throat. With him worrying about someone watching, it only made it more likely that exactly what he feared would come to pass - this person, whoever they were, would doubt his capability, his place in this fight.

Logically, he knew they wouldn't. Plenty of  _ actual  _ women fought on their side, but he still couldn't help but worry. Being a woman was different to hiding that he maybe wasn't the man people thought he was. It wasn't  _ very  _ different, and maybe Lucina had already done exactly that, but it was plenty enough to set him on edge.

Even as the battle wound up, there were still eyes on him. He could tell. It left his eyes roaming their group, desperately trying to work out who it was. Who knew things about him that he shouldn't. But even as his eyes moved, the answers weren't forthcoming.

His eyes caught Severa's as he looked; she was the only one with a gaze turned in his direction. When their eyes met, however, she just rolled her eyes at him. It probably wasn't her - if she'd spotted him out dancing in the middle of the night, she wouldn't have run away when he spotted her. She  _ probably  _ would have gently or not-so-gently mocked him about it and moved on.

So it had to be someone else. Someone else who wasn't looking at him, even though he was sure they were.

He still felt just a little out of place when the evening meal rolled around. He felt awkward enough that he didn't have the stomach for finding a pretty girl to talk to, as if one of them would turn round and accuse him of being fake in front of the whole mess tent (anyone actually doing that was probably a baseless fear, but Inigo couldn't stop it sneaking in). Instead, he sat alone, his back to the tent fabric as he watched people go by.

He wasn't really surprised when Morgan slid onto the bench opposite him. They shot him a sunny smile. "Hey, Inigo! You looked sorta miserable on your own. Everything alright?"

"Oh, yes, yes, I'm fine as anything!" he said. He tried to smile in return, but it didn't have the energy he could usually summon for a smile.

If Morgan noticed, they didn't let on. "Good," they said. "I was just wondering, because the battle today was kind of rough. Not what I was expecting, anyway."

In all honesty, Inigo had been so distracted the whole day that he hadn't  _ noticed  _ it being any more difficult than usual. "No, I was perfectly alright," he said. "What about you?"

"Fine in the end," they replied, and somehow their smile shone even brighter. "I'm not always most at home on the battlefield, but I think I managed."

"Glad to hear it," he said, and this time the smile was genuine. He didn't know if they realised just how good it was to talk to someone without worrying about, well, everything. With them, he could let himself relax. Just a little.

Morgan took a pause in idly chewing on a tougher chunk of bread to dunk him straight in the deep end. "Hey, Inigo, why don't you show other people your dancing?"

"What?" Inigo tried to push down against the spike of fear in his chest and the way his voice rose as he spoke. Morgan only let out a small laugh. "It was you? You watched me dance last night!"

"Uh-huh," they said with a nod. "You're pretty good. Was I not meant to see?"

"Were you not-" Inigo let out a shaky sigh. "I was dancing in the middle of the woods in the middle of the night, of course you weren't meant to see! No one is meant to see."

"Do you not like people knowing you can do it?" they asked, their head cocked to one side.

"On principle, it's fine, but..." It was so hard to explain. Even to them, it was tricky; how was he to know how they'd feel about this? How they felt about him keeping it from everyone, including them? "Sometimes when I dance, I look a little... feminine."

They paused for a moment, looking him up and down. With this, surely, they could put the pieces together. "Ohhh," they said with a nod. "I understand now. Though if you're worried about all of that, you should just tell Dad!"

"Absolutely not!" he said. It was hard to keep his voice low, but he had to; he couldn't have anyone suspecting something was up and trying to listen in. "I haven't even told Mother yet. Let  _ alone  _ our father."

"He'd definitely be fine with it," Morgan said firmly. They crossed their arms over their chest as they spoke. "He always was for me. Kind, and caring. And not just in the past I remember, either - he's been great since I've been here. You won't be any different."

"And what if this isn't the same Robin?" he asked. Perhaps it was cruel to throw doubt on what little Morgan knew of their past, but that didn't mean they were right all the time. "I can't..." He shook his head. It was impossible to get his thoughts straight when it came to something like this. There was just too much at stake.

"Maybe I should just tell him," Morgan said. "Get the two of you in the room together and then..." They gestured at the air, seemingly unaware of the fear rising in Inigo's chest.

"Please don't," he managed. He hoped he didn't sound as desperate as he felt - he couldn't think of anything worse.

"Alright," they replied, shooting him their usual sunny smile. "That's fine, I just thought you needed the push. I can leave you alone if you don't want it."

"I don't," he confirmed, his tone stronger this time. They looked just the tiniest bit upset, and he had no desire to leave the conversation on a sour note. Despite their... eccentricities, he sort of appreciated the concern. "So thank you. For saying that you won't."

"Of course," they said. "Buuut..." They paused as they stood, leaving Inigo's nerves rising once more. "I still think you should tell someone. If no one knows, it could be a danger to you." Their voice was firm, but the words didn't sit right with him.

"I don't think so," he said, trying not to fiddle too much with his remaining food. His appetite had all but vanished at this point. "Why would you say so?"

"You bind your chest," they answered simply, their voice thankfully low enough that Inigo was fairly confident no one would hear. "I know that isn't necessarily  _ dangerous,  _ and I'm sure you know what you're doing, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't tell someone."

"There are plenty of other people who know," he argued. Out of all of them who'd travelled to the past, it was only Morgan who'd found out so late. With the rest of them having known him for a pretty significant portion of their lives, they were familiar with it. They all left him alone about it; it was only Morgan who'd raised any kind of concern.

"Well, if you  _ want  _ Brady to be your personal healer, then you can deal with that," they said, shrugging. "But maybe you shouldn't place that expectation on him alone. I don't think it's fair."

Inigo sighed. "I suppose you're right," he said. They definitely were. "I'll talk to... someone. Thank you for not telling anyone else."

"Still think you should talk to Dad!" they said, and this time their voice was loud, audible. Several people looked over, amused smiles on their faces. He supposed that made his decision for him.

After that particular incident, it wasn't hard to organise to get put on an evening patrol rotation with Robin. When he asked, the person in charge of all of it just smiled and wrote it down; Inigo was just glad that she didn't pry into the reasoning. He had enough to worry about, of course.

-

The evening of the patrol came around sooner than he expected, the hours slipping away like sand even as it felt like each second took forever to pass. Or maybe that was the nerves talking.

It wasn't like he didn't know what to do, because he'd had this conversation many times before. Too many times, even. But that meant he was prepared, and he knew what to say, what people might answer in reply. So even as his heart hammered in his chest as he and Robin made their way out to the perimeter of the army's camp, he knew that he could do it.

This didn't, however, stop his nervousness from being noticeable. Robin was an unusually perceptive person only sometimes, but he seemed to have noticed this time. When they hit the halfway point, far away from camp or any watchtower, he stopped him. "Inigo," Robin said. "Are you alright?"

"Right as rain!" he said, but from the way Robin's forehead creased in confusion he could tell that his words hadn't been entirely comprehensible. "I just, uh. Have something to say. And now I'm here, trying to say it, and I realise I don't really know how." Because, yes, this was a conversation he'd had before. But he'd never had it with the past version of his father who hadn't had a child yet.

"You know," Robin said with a short laugh, "there's a definite resemblance between you and your mother. I didn't see it at first, but you're shy beyond all the bluster, aren't you?"

"A little," he managed, and Inigo wasn't sure  _ what  _ his nervous laughter sounded like to anyone else, but it sounded hideous to him. Maybe slightly pathetic, too. "It's definitely not the best trait to have inherited at a time like this."

"I understand," Robin said, though he couldn't possibly understand all of this. "And whatever it is you have to say, I'm sure it's fine. It can't be as odd or as complicated as speaking to your father from the past in the first place, right?"

He was right there, and yet, his throat dried out even more when he opened his mouth. "It's hard to say it plain, even with your words of encouragement," he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck and trying not to let his nerves get the better of him now. "I... in the future, you and my mother care for each other very deeply."

"We already do," he said firmly, and Inigo nodded.

"I didn't mean it like that, I meant-" As he spoke, he gestured at himself, hoping that would get the message across. Robin only chuckled, so he hoped it did. "But- ah- when you had a child, the baby was announced as a girl."

Robin paused. Inigo almost wished that they were still walking, just so he could make some kind of attempt to get away. But they were alone, suspended in the silence of the forest, and there was no escape. "I see."

His tone didn't betray anything at all, but Inigo's mind filled - somehow - with even more fear. He must have said the wrong thing. Maybe, out of everything, this was the thing Robin couldn't stand for. When he looked up, there was something so inscrutable on Robin's face. Was it disappointment? Anger? Surprise?

Silence, again. Robin opened his mouth, and the buzzing in Inigo's ears increased in volume. There was a tightness in his chest and he didn't think he could quite bear it. "Did you feel like you had to hide this?" he asked. His voice was soft, and Inigo was hesitant to call it kind, but he so desperately wanted to.

He nodded, attempting to ignore the tears he could feel building up behind his eyes. He'd come so far on this; he couldn't cry now and throw it all away.

"Why?" It was a good question. All Inigo could do was let out a choked sob that he wanted to make sound like a laugh.

His shoulders felt locked up as he shrugged, momentarily lost for words. This was too much. "It's hard to talk about," he managed. His voice sounded tight, but thankfully not high.

"Of course," Robin said. His words were careful. "I can only imagine. Can I... ask you why you chose now to tell me?"

Inigo nodded, swallowing twice. Maybe he could get some of the fear under control now Robin didn't seem angry. Just cautious. "Morgan told me that people should know," he said. "They made good arguments, for better or worse." He let out a short laugh, and it sounded more real than he expected.

"They can be quite persuasive when they want to be," Robin agreed, returning Inigo's attempt at humour. "In that case, is there anything I can do for you? If you want people to know but don't want to talk to them, or if I need to have a conversation with-"

He sounded so calculating, almost like he did in tactics meetings. Inigo knew the way this would pan out: suggestions, an action plan, some variables. The approach that was so like his father was welcome, of course, but he didn't think he could deal with it right now. "Mother," he said. Robin looked at him with something undeniably close to surprise in his eyes. "I need to talk to her about this. She doesn't know yet, and I'd- I'd like her to."

"Absolutely," Robin replied. He hesitated, just for a moment, and then drew a little closer to him. Inigo was shorter than him - he always had been and probably always would be - but he didn't feel as nervous as he expected to. Robin reached over and... ruffled his hair. "Thank you for telling me," he said. He laughed again; a nervous laugh, full of the unavoidable distance between them. A distance that, just maybe, was closing little by little.

But it was the next phrase that did Inigo in completely, causing the frantically muffled sobs to tear from his chest. "I'm proud of you,” Robin said. “You don't need to hide anymore."

**Author's Note:**

> Ty for reading! :) if you enjoyed this, please consider leaving a comment to let me know. I also have a twitter over @samariumwriting where I talk about my (mostly fe3h) work


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